we bought dinner at the liquor store

What say you we fix up some beer-braised brisket, but instead of using that frenchy monk Chimay crap, we git 'r Ameri-dun and slosh it with some Schlitz? Can I get a 'booya'?

And then let's slip into something a little more comfortable as the beast roasts... I know! How about a delectably intoxicating punch recipe created by Alexis Soyer during the Crimean War (c.1854-1856.) According to Florence Nightingale, Soydawg served up eats "of the most nutritious manner for great numbers of men," on the front lines of battle, and they freakin loved him for it.

Anddd apparently they liked to get silly-drunk as well, so he whipped up this ridiculous concoction for the fellers. I'd say after about 10 quarts of this crap (which includes 2 bottles of champy, a pint of henny, and a mess of rum) I'd be ready to take a whole mess of russkies myself--imperial, commie-bastard-- it's all the same with this juice what's now fit for an unfortunate ending to a frat party.

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trailer trash

Well, what better way to celebrate the release of a trailerpark-based canadian movie, than with a so-themed meal?

Let us pray.

Dear Lord, we thank you for the gifts of completely non-nutritious food-type products which you have bestowed upon our barren table. Tater tots so divinely crispylicious, stacked beside mounds of perfectly deep-fried chicken fingers.

Oh lordly Lord. And that pepperoni, spiced to perfection and placed with cheese and pickled jalapenos upon silver dollar-sized hamburglers ("sliders", dear Lord of bounty, as your infinite wisdom would confirm,) your omnipotence in this realm, among others, hits the biblical spot.

What could possibly punctuate such heavenish gastronomy, but a cool can of Old Milwaukee's finest pilsner brew. Thank you dear Lord, and though this feast may or may not cause me to die much sooner than you had intended, I can now surely do so as a happy man.

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